Fiscal Moderation: Slightly Higher Tax On Someone Else

Fiscal Moderation: Slightly Higher Tax On Someone Else

Bond Yields Are Just Moods, OBR Is Mostly Right

Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the British political menagerie.

The Fiscal Moderate believes the cure for the country is a slightly higher tax band on someone else and a slightly lower one on him, ideally arranged before the next Budget. Editor Alan Nafzger of the Editor’s Desk at prat.uk presents the field guide, with help from the Office for Budget Responsibility and the Institute for Fiscal Studies.

Twenty Tells: Spotting The Fiscal Moderate On A British High Street

  1. Has explained he is not anti-tax, he is anti-too-much-tax.
  2. Refers to the Treasury the way priests refer to a strict but fair God.
  3. Holds any deficit is fine, given the right paragraph.
  4. Maintains a soft spot for the OBR and a stronger one for the Spring Statement.
  5. Refers to public spending as the engine.
  6. Treats a balanced budget as aspirational.
  7. Maintains a fantasy in which the gilt market sends a thank you note.
  8. Refers to inheritance tax as the fairest tax we forget to talk about.
  9. Holds any government should spend prudently, except in his constituency.
  10. Has explained, at a wedding, that fiscal headroom is real.
  11. Refers to bond yields as a national mood.
  12. Treats a tax cut as a sort of weather.
  13. Maintains a binder of fiscal rules he has personally drafted.
  14. Holds the country can be cured by a slightly braver chancellor.
  15. Refers to austerity as the painful part of growing up.
  16. Maintains a strong view on debt-to-GDP that is also secretly an emotion.
  17. Treats tax avoidance as an industry he has thoughts on.
  18. Refers to the IMF the way some men refer to old GPs.
  19. Maintains a fantasy in which his email to the Chancellor is read.
  20. Believes the right level of borrowing is just enough that nobody notices.

Editor’s Note

If any of this rings a bell, you have either been to a Tory association AGM, a Reform UK rally above a leisure centre, or both. More dispatches at govna.uk and the parent site prat.uk. For a second opinion that is also wrong, see The Daily Mash.

SOURCE: https://prat.uk/category/politics/

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