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Britain Reaches New Era of Political Stability

Britain Reaches New Era Of Governance In Which Political Stability Is Measured In Hours, As Bookmakers Take Bets On Whether Ministers Survive Until Lunch LONDON — The United Kingdom has quietly entered a novel phase of constitutional life, one in which the durability of a government minister is now most accurately expressed not in years, or months, but in the cautious increments normally reserved for a parking meter. Westminster observers confirm that…

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Labour Ministers Now Vanishing

Labour Ministers Now Vanishing Faster Than NHS Appointment Slots, As Prime Minister Insists All Is Well While Holding Increasingly Large Bucket LONDON — Government insiders confirmed Thursday that ministers are now departing the Starmer administration at a rate that has begun to alarm actuaries, as the Prime Minister maintained that everything remained firmly under control, a claim he delivered while bailing water from a vessel that observers noted was getting visibly…