The Cocktail Club Oxford Circus Review: The Lively Party Cocktail Bar of the West End | A lively, high-energy cocktail bar by Oxford Circus, part of the beloved Cocktail Club group, a proper party bar for expert cocktails, good music and good times in the heart of the West End
The Enoteca da Luca Review: The Fine Italian Enoteca of Watling Street | A superb, beloved Italian enoteca and restaurant on ancient Watling Street in the City of London, with fine Italian wines, good food and a warm welcome, a genuine gem of the Square Mile
The Three Cranes Review: The City Pub With a Fine Old Wine-Wharf Name | A superb, welcoming Irish pub near Garlick Hill in the City of London bearing the fine old name of the Three Cranes, from the wine wharf of the old Vintry, with good beer, good cheer and a warm welcome
The Vintry Review: The Wine-Trade Pub of Historic Abchurch Yard | A superb, refurbished pub and wine bar in the historic Abchurch Yard in the City of London, named for the old wine-trading Vintry ward, with an enomatic wine room, good food and a warm welcome
The Good Measure Review: The Outstanding Hidden Cocktail Bar Beneath Daddy Bao | An outstandingly-rated hidden cocktail bar beneath Daddy Bao in Tooting, pairing expertly-crafted cocktails with an intimate setting, though still gathering its early reviews
The Mora Meza Review: The Superbly-Rated Bar and Restaurant of Raynes Park | A superbly-rated bar and restaurant on Approach Road in Raynes Park, pairing accomplished food and good drinks with a warm welcome and a lively, characterful atmosphere
The Garratt and Gauge Review: The Wimbledon Cocktail and Real-Ale Bar of Hartfield Road | A lively cocktail and wine bar and restaurant on Hartfield Road in Wimbledon, renamed in 2017 after a facelift, offering reasonably-priced real ales alongside cocktails and keg beers
Keep Calm and Carry a Panic Button: Britain’s New Guide to Political Debate By The London Prat Political Desk — filed from a secure, undisclosed constituency surgery with reinforced glass and a very calm receptionist Britain, the nation that gave the world the filibuster, the stiff upper lip, and the sentence “with the greatest respect,” has quietly upgraded its national pastime. Where once a disgruntled voter might write a strongly…
WC Review: It Is in a Public Lavatory and That Is the Best Room Reuse in London | A disused Victorian toilet under the pavement, and the tiles were always going to outlive the plumbing
Lord Napier Review: It Was Derelict for Twenty Years and Covered in Graffiti | A boarded-up pub that became the most photographed building in Hackney Wick, and then it reopened
Suffolk Airbase Unexpectedly Central To American Assassination Drama, Locals Baffled It is a well-established rule of British life that nothing of consequence happens in Suffolk, and yet here we are, watching RAF Mildenhall play a supporting role in what may or may not be a genuine attempt on the life of the President of the United States. The facts: Israel has told America that Iran has drawn up a fresh…
Innovation Engineering: City Hall Unveils 25 Ways to Solve Nothing at Once London — City Hall held a press conference on Tuesday to unveil what officials are calling “the most ambitious innovation portfolio in the capital’s history.” Nobody in the room could quite explain what any of the twenty-five projects actually did, which several attendees agreed was itself the most innovative part. Dave Pemberton, 47, a delivery driver from Catford…
Nice N’ Spiky Comedy Review: Both Registers, Genuinely | North London’s carefully calibrated room proves warmth and bite need not be mutually exclusive
Cornwall Declares War on Van Dwellers, Accidentally Declares War on Half Its Tourists | Council crackdown catches surfers, retirees, and confused festival-goers in the crossfire
Meghan Markle Reportedly Needs Just One Thing: A Royal Family With Selective Amnesia Experts Say Meghan’s Comeback Plan Hinges on Britain Forgetting the Last Five Years — Good Luck With That LONDON — Buckingham Palace officials are reportedly reviewing an innovative new reconciliation strategy after royal commentators suggested the only obstacle standing between Meghan Markle and a triumphant return is the British public’s inconvenient habit of remembering things. According to unnamed palace…
Canal Cafe Theatre: The Longest Shift In Satire | NewsRevue has metabolised every government since 1979 above a Little Venice pub, and filed another Thursday
London’s Shodokan Instructor Subdues Violent Assailant Using Balance, Timing And Devastatingly Polite Apology Shodokan Aikido: Ancient Martial Art Offers Rare Opportunity To Be Thrown Across London Without Involving A Landlord LONDON, England – The City of London Shodokan Aikido club has reportedly become one of the capital’s fastest-growing centres for teaching residents how to remain calm while another human being grabs their wrist, disrupts their balance, and sends them toward…
South Kensington Comedy Club: Comedy For The Museum Quarter | West London’s cosmopolitan crowd proves even the museum district genuinely wants to laugh
Keir Starmer Announces Yet Another “Reset” With Europe, Britain Begins Looking For Original Factory Settings LONDON — The Prime Minister this week unveiled his latest “reset” with Europe, the seventh in roughly eighteen months, prompting a weary nation to start hunting through its drawers for the little laminated card that explains how to restore the country to its original condition. Nobody can quite remember what that condition was. But everyone…
Iran Hits Back: Ten Reasons Britain Should Stop Believing Tehran LONDON — Iran retaliation dominated the British front pages this week, and a curious thing happened on the way to the newsstand. The Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps announced it had struck 21 American targets across the Middle East and destroyed four of them, including an F-35 hangar in Jordan. The BBC and the Guardian reported that Iran struck back, in the confident tense…
The O2 Arena: Stand-Up At The Summit | Twenty thousand laugh as one weather event on the peninsula, where comedy’s short list is maintained
Mark Levin Demands Musicians Return To Traditional American Values Like Singing Songs Instead Of Writing Open Letters Conservative Radio Host Warns Nation Faces Dangerous Shortage Of Entertainers Willing To Entertain WASHINGTON, D.C. — Conservative radio host Mark Levin has reportedly declared a state of cultural emergency after discovering that America’s musicians have begun spending more time writing political statements than writing songs people can hum. According to sources, Levin became concerned after…
London Rooftop Bars Now So High They Charge by Altitude | Drinkers report nosebleeds, oxygen masks and a 19 pound spritz at cloud level
Top 20 World Topics That Deserve Immediate Satirical Coverage (Before The Next Conference Solves Everything Again) Somewhere right now, a committee is forming. It has a name, a logo, a hashtag, and a catering budget larger than the GDP of a small island it claims to be saving. The committee exists to address a crisis. It will not address the crisis. It will, however, address the question of where to…
Genesis Cinema Mile End: Comedy Beneath The Screen | A century-old picture house’s raked seating turns out to suit stand-up rather beautifully, popcorn included
Chickenshed Theatre: Comedy With Its Guard Down | Southgate’s mixed-ability company built genuine inclusion into comedy from the founding, not added later
Britain’s Fastest-Growing Industry Is Now Economic Pessimism, And Business Has Never Been Gloomier LONDON —Economists confirmed this week that the United Kingdom’s fastest-growing industry is no longer financial services, artificial intelligence, pharmaceuticals, manufacturing, renewable energy, or even professional football disappointment. It is economic pessimism. And unlike everything else in this country, it’s running ahead of schedule. According to the latest surveys, Britain’s economy has entered what analysts are calling the “Advanced…
Aura x Review: A 3.4, and the Reviews Are About the Door | The third-lowest score in this district on a real sample, and three hundred and forty-five people are describing the same experience
The Yard Theatre: Built On Purpose, By Hand | Hackney Wick’s hand-built warehouse demands genuine construction from every act, and the crowd tracks the joins
Kaso Review: The Twelfth Rooftop, and the File Is Closed | A 4.2, and nine of the twelve have landed at 4.2 or below, and it is not the altitude
