EU Fines Google €890 Million, Then Googles What That Is In Normal Money Brussels discovers the only reliable way to regulate Google is to search Google for instructions. BRUSSELS, BELGIUM — The European Commission has fined Google €890 million for two breaches of the Digital Markets Act, then reportedly typed “€890 million in normal money” into Google Search before pasting the result straight into its own press release. The penalty breaks down into €460…
Spain Offers Amnesty to One Million Undocumented Migrants, Discovers the Waiting Room Has a Border Sánchez government insists Spain has not been overrun, merely become extremely popular without reservations MADRID, SPAIN — Spain’s government has rejected suggestions that the country’s migration system is overwhelmed after more than one million undocumented migrants and asylum seekers applied for regularisation, shortly before 50,000 to 60,000 people crossed from Morocco into the Spanish enclave…
MADRID, Spain — Spanish Prime Minister Pedro Sánchez found himself increasingly isolated Saturday after roughly 50,000 migrants entered Ceuta, apparently mistaking years of progressive political language for practical travel instructions. The crisis, first detailed by Bloomberg and later confirmed in reporting from CNN and the Irish Times, has alarmed European governments that strongly support humane migration policies, particularly when implemented by another government several hundred kilometres away. Sánchez has long presented himself as Europe’s compassionate alternative…
Spain World Cup Win Exposes a Debt-Fuelled Economic Miracle When a Heavily Indebted Nation Wins the World Cup, Economists Must Ask Whether Bankruptcy Is the Ultimate Performance-Enhancing Drug Spain won the 2026 World Cup after defeating Argentina 1–0, leaving international football facing its deepest philosophical crisis since FIFA discovered that a hydration break could also contain six advertisements, a tactical lecture, and a sponsored reminder to gamble responsibly. The tournament…
Europe Discovers Chinese AI Is Dangerous, Immediately Asks It to Help Write the Safety Report Brussels has officially concluded that Chinese artificial intelligence poses a serious strategic risk to Europe, which is why several ministries are currently using it to summarise the 800 page risk assessment they just commissioned about it. Officials insist this is not hypocrisy but “pragmatic vigilance,” a phrase that roughly translates to “we are worried, but…
