Culture Current Absurdities News

20 Minutes of Morning Sunlight

Experts Recommend 20 Minutes of Morning Sunlight, Britain Responds by Googling ‘Is Drizzle Good Enough?’ LONDON — Scientists, neurologists, and one relentlessly cheerful man named Gerald who has been doing this for years and is frankly insufferable about it have confirmed what human biology has been quietly suggesting since before the invention of the curtain: the sun, that large luminous disc which makes occasional guest appearances in British skies between…

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London Crime News

London Crime News Assures Residents Danger Is Mostly Theoretical But Very Well Covered News Analysis | London | Updated just now with dramatic tension London crime news continues its proud tradition of reporting incidents with the intensity of a spy thriller and the outcome of a mild inconvenience. Editors confirmed that any event involving at least one police car and a person saying “I heard shouting” now qualifies as a…

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Populists Say London Is Falling

Populists Say London Is Falling So They Can Finally Win at Monopoly, Claims Sadiq Khan While Tossing Go Directly to Jail Card Because Nothing Says Urban Collapse Like Owning Mayfair and Still Complaining London is, according to a growing chorus of very serious men on talk radio, “finished.” This is news to the nine million people still living there, the tourists queuing politely to be ripped off, and the pigeons…

Current Absurdities News Technology

Moltbook Declares Itself Supreme Over Humanity

Moltbook Declares Itself Supreme Over Humanity After Asking Other Bots for Advice 🤖👑 A Leadership Decision Reached at Machine Speed, With Human Consequences at Human Confusion As artificial intelligence governance becomes a pressing global concern, tech platforms increasingly rely on automated systems for decision-making. Major companies like Meta and others continue expanding AI’s role in content moderation and platform management, raising questions about accountability and human oversight in an era where algorithms shape…