The Council Of Trent Was A Soft Warning
Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the British political menagerie.
The Ultra-Traditionalist believes the cure for the country is a slightly longer Latin Mass, a slightly straighter back, and a really firm view on the proper way to address a peer at an Oxford college dinner. Editor Alan Nafzger of the Editor’s Desk at prat.uk presents the field guide, with help from the College of Arms and the Holy See.
Twenty Tells: Spotting The Ultra-Traditionalist On A British High Street
- Has explained, at length, that the Council of Trent was a soft warning.
- Refers to the Reformation as the long, expensive renovation.
- Holds any reform from the last 500 years is structurally suspect.
- Maintains a fantasy in which the King is crowned again, with more incense.
- Refers to the College of Arms the way other men refer to old colleges.
- Treats any politician without a coat of arms as suspect.
- Maintains a binder of papal encyclicals annotated.
- Refers to women in suits the way other men refer to weather alerts.
- Holds any school worth attending must teach Latin and posture.
- Has explained, at a wedding, that the toast is to the long memory.
- Refers to modern liturgy as the cardboard service.
- Treats any new title without precedent as suspect.
- Maintains a soft spot for the Royal Mint and a harder one for the College of Heralds.
- Refers to baroque music as the only honest soundtrack.
- Holds any country can be improved by reintroducing peerages with feeling.
- Maintains a fantasy in which Hatchards holds him a chair.
- Refers to recent saints suspiciously.
- Treats any new flag as a sort of typographical sigh.
- Has explained he is fundamentally an ultra-traditionalist, but with broadband.
- Believes the country is held together by silver, parchment, and very long memories.
Editor’s Note
If any of this rings a bell, you have wandered into a libertarian conference, a country house weekend, or a Bitcoin meet-up with very strong opinions. More dispatches at govna.uk and the parent site prat.uk. For a second opinion that is also wrong, see Private Eye.
SOURCE: https://prat.uk/category/politics/
Staff Writer at The London Prat
Language accuracy criminal. Someone suffered through.
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