Tag: Telegraph

Business Royals

Duke of Sussex Believes Reconciliation Begins With Direct Deposit

AMW

Historians Note Medieval Princes Also Preferred Forgiveness With Monthly Payments LONDON — Royal historians, financial analysts and several men currently hiding from their ex-wives have united in admiration this week after reports emerged suggesting that Prince Harry’s latest understanding of family reconciliation begins with the same question millions of ordinary Britons ask every payday: “Has the money gone through yet?” According to unnamed palace observers — and people who communicate exclusively…

Business Culture Entertainment Royals

California Lifestyle Costs Slightly More Than Frogmore Cottage

Aishwarya Rao

LONDON, England. Prince Harry is reportedly seeking financial assistance from King Charles III, proving that no matter how many documentaries, memoirs, podcasts, interviews, Oprah sit-downs, and gently-lit candid photo opportunities a person produces, eventually every family group chat circles back to the one truly universal message: “Dad, could you help me out?” Royal historians say the British monarchy survived the Vikings, three civil wars, the abdication crisis, and Fergie’s toe situation, but nobody…

Current Absurdities News

Who Should Control British Newspapers?

Alan Nafzger

Who Should Control British Newspapers? Or: How Britain Accidentally Invented the World’s Most Polite Media Oligarchy There are countries where the press is controlled by the state. There are countries where the press is controlled by corporations. And then there is Britain, where the press is controlled by a small rotating cast of billionaires who all insist, with straight faces and folded napkins, that they are merely “custodians of tradition.”…

News

Plus Social Promises “Free Speech Plus”

Lotte Heidenreich

Plus Social Promises “Free Speech Plus,” Refuses to Clarify What the Plus Covers When Plus Social launched, it did so with the confidence of a startup that has read exactly three history books and skimmed the table of contents. The promise was bold, heroic even: Free Speech Plus. Not just free speech, mind you. That’s old speech. That’s speech with dents in it. This was speech with an upgrade, speech…

News Social

Reading the News Backwards

Lotte Heidenreich

Behavioural research suggests starting with final paragraph reduces anxiety and prepares readers for disappointment Reading the News Backwards People already skim the news; reading it backwards just makes that honest. Most articles end by admitting nothing is resolved. Headlines are designed to frighten you; conclusions are designed to calm advertisers. Reading the last paragraph first saves time and emotional energy. Nobody reaches the end of an article unless they are…