Tag: Ecclesiastes 3:1

Political

Ecclesiastes 3:1: Ministers Order an Inquiry Into Autumn

Isla Campbell

The Government’s Perspective: Ecclesiastes 3:1 Is Referred to a Select Committee Because God Failed to Publish a Timetable WESTMINSTER, LONDON: The government has announced a cross-departmental initiative to bring autumn under greater democratic oversight after commuters demanded an explanation for why seasonal leaves continue to interfere with London railway services. The newly established Minister for Seasonal Accountability, Oliver Wetherby, said the public had endured enough surprises from the natural world.…

Environment

Wrong Kind of Leaves? Sycamore Says It Was Here First

Mei Lin Chen

The Tree’s Perspective: Ecclesiastes Says There Is a Season for Everything, Including Being Blamed for British Transport Failures BROMLEY, SOUTH LONDON: A sycamore tree overlooking a commuter railway has formally rejected accusations of sabotage after being blamed for seasonal train disruption despite having remained in the same place for 118 years. The tree, represented by local gardener Margaret Price, issued a statement objecting to the phrase “the wrong kind of…