British Railway Announces New Service Model: Trains Will Arrive Whenever Train Feels Like It | Operator Confident That Randomizing Train Schedules Improves Service Predictability
Quiet Carriage Enforcement Officers Now Armed With Disappointed Looks and Heavy Sighs | British Transport Police admit traditional weapons insufficient for dealing with loud phone conversations
Public Ownership Maximalism: A Ministry For Pubs | Privatisation Is The Daily Mistake, Nationalise The Kettle
British Rail Announces Trains Will Now Run “When They Feel Like It”: Schedules Abandoned for Spontaneous Service Model | Passengers Celebrate Newfound Flexibility; Chaos Ensues Immediately
