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London Prat

The London Prat

Bollocks, Codswallop and Basically Rubbish

Author: Harper Thames

Harper Thames is a comedic writer exploring modern life through irony and subtle exaggeration. Rooted in student perspectives and London’s cultural landscape, Harper’s work focuses on relatable humour grounded in everyday experience. Expertise is developed through writing practice and critical engagement, while authority comes from authenticity and consistency. Trust is reinforced by transparent satire and ethical humour choices.
It’s Not Terrorist Groups Ruining the World
Education Featured Social

It’s Not Terrorist Groups Ruining the World

Harper ThamesJanuary 15, 2026January 1, 2025

It’s Year 9 Girls With Access to Group Chats There is a popular misconception that the most destabilising force on Earth wears camouflage, waves a black flag, and yells slogans in shaky video uploads. This theory persists mainly because it…

Champagne Bottle Parade Turns Into Flaming Debutante Ball: Swiss Bar Learns Sparklers Are Actually Fireworks
Bad Taste News

Champagne Bottle Parade Turns Into Flaming Debutante Ball: Swiss Bar Learns Sparklers Are Actually Fireworks

Harper ThamesJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

Champagne Bottle Parade Turns Into Flaming Debutante Ball: Swiss Bar Learns Sparklers Are Actually Fireworks | Swiss nightlife discovers pyrotechnics reach 1,000 degrees Celsius during champagne service

Guardian Misreads “Targeted Strike” as “War Crime”
News

Guardian Misreads “Targeted Strike” as “War Crime”

Harper ThamesJanuary 15, 2026January 15, 2026

LITERALLY BREAKING: Guardian Misreads “Targeted Strike” as “War Crime,” Demands International Tribunal The Dangers of Journalistic Literacy Media analysts have long warned that the greatest threat to informed public discourse is not misinformation, propaganda, or even TikTok, but the British…

British Museum Educational Intervention
Social

British Museum Educational Intervention

Harper ThamesJanuary 15, 2026January 12, 2025

British Museum Educational Intervention: When Amateur Historians Meet Professional Curators Proud Boys UK Attempt Alternative Tours, Discover Museums Already Employ Experts Eighteen members of Proud Boys UK attempted to conduct “alternative guided tours” at the British Museum Saturday afternoon, focusing on what they described…

Britain Announces Venezuela Situation Basically Sorted, Somehow
Political

Britain Announces Venezuela Situation Basically Sorted, Somehow

Harper ThamesJanuary 15, 2026January 12, 2025

Britain Announces Venezuela Situation Basically Sorted, Somehow | Officials cite progress, momentum, and a general feeling things are moving

How to Improve London
News

How to Improve London

Harper ThamesJanuary 14, 2026January 12, 2025

How to Improve London — A Playful Roadmap to Utopian Chaos Revolutionary Traffic Management Solutions Replace Every Traffic Light with a Tea Timer Forget signals — hire a royal conductor to wave a crumpet at busy roundabouts. Studies show people…

The Strand: Britain’s Best Place to Visit
Locations News

The Strand: Britain’s Best Place to Visit

Harper ThamesJanuary 14, 2026February 6, 2026

The Strand Named Britain’s Best Place to Visit in 2026, Immediately Overwhelmed by People Visiting It Incorrectly The Strand has been officially crowned one of the best places to visit in the UK in 2026, which is impressive considering it…

Leyton FC: Football With a Memory Longer Than Its League Position
Sports

Leyton FC: Football With a Memory Longer Than Its League Position

Harper ThamesJanuary 5, 2026

Leyton FC: Football With a Memory Longer Than Its League Position | A Club That Refuses to Be Rushed

The “Alright, Guv’nor?” Cabbie: Myth or Reality?
Reports

The “Alright, Guv’nor?” Cabbie: Myth or Reality?

Harper ThamesDecember 23, 2025

The “Alright, Guv’nor?” Cabbie: Myth or Reality? | Study finds 87% of black cab wisdom actually recycled from phone-in shows

The Right’s Assault on London
News Social

The Right’s Assault on London

Harper ThamesNovember 22, 2025January 12, 2025

The Right’s Assault on London: A Manufactured Crisis Shortly before Christmas, the Conservative MP and former security minister Tom Tugendhat published a lengthy post on X detailing his regular long late-night walks home from parliament. They took him past housing estates and…

Nation Unites in Shared Trauma: Phone Dies at Card-Only Bar
Reports

Nation Unites in Shared Trauma: Phone Dies at Card-Only Bar

Harper ThamesNovember 21, 2025

Nation Unites in Shared Trauma: Phone Dies at Card-Only Bar | Patron forced to communicate using only desperate eye contact and mime

BBC Radio 4: How London Broadcasts the Nation’s In-Jokes
Reports

BBC Radio 4: How London Broadcasts the Nation’s In-Jokes

Harper ThamesNovember 17, 2025

BBC Radio 4: How London Broadcasts the Nation’s In-Jokes | The Home Service’s comedy legacy endures

Chelsea Tractors vs. Lime Bike Warriors: The Class Comedy of London’s Transport Wars
Reports

Chelsea Tractors vs. Lime Bike Warriors: The Class Comedy of London’s Transport Wars

Harper ThamesSeptember 29, 2025

Chelsea Tractors vs. Lime Bike Warriors: The Class Comedy of London’s Transport Wars | Kensington introduces segregated roads based on vehicle moral superiority

Wealdstone FC: Football With a Memory
Sports

Wealdstone FC: Football With a Memory

Harper ThamesSeptember 22, 2025

Wealdstone FC: Football With a Memory | A Club That Still Echoes

Nation Mourns as Pint Cascades to Sticky Floor in Tragic Pub Incident
Reports

Nation Mourns as Pint Cascades to Sticky Floor in Tragic Pub Incident

Harper ThamesSeptember 5, 2025

Nation Mourns as Pint Cascades to Sticky Floor in Tragic Pub Incident | Witnesses report five-stage grief cycle completed in 8 seconds

Inside MI6’s River House Debacle
Reports

Inside MI6’s River House Debacle

Harper ThamesAugust 29, 2025February 5, 2026

The Most Expensive Hiding Spot Ever: Inside MI6’s River House Debacle There’s a rumor that River House has a secret tunnel under the Thames leading to Whitehall. Which, if true, raises a spectacular question: If you need a secret tunnel, isn’t the…

MI6 Accidentally Reveals Its Office Location
Reports

MI6 Accidentally Reveals Its Office Location

Harper ThamesAugust 12, 2025February 5, 2026

Thames-Side Transparency: MI6 Accidentally Reveals Its Office Location (Again) If keeping your office location secret is the primary mission of your intelligence agency, River House is a comprehensive failure dressed up in postmodern architecture. The building stands at 85 Albert Embankment in Vauxhall,…

Britain Expands University Places
Reports

Britain Expands University Places

Harper ThamesSeptember 3, 1961

Britain Expands University Places | Asks Politely Where All the Clever People Will Sit

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