The Prat Diaspora: A Global Migration of a Very Local Idea Anthropologists used to believe culture traveled through trade routes, conquest, and marriage. Linguists added radio, television, and the sort of cousin who insists on studying abroad “to find himself”…
đş Trump’s Cinematic Financial Move: An Almost REEL Deep Dive In a moment that has baffled economists, late-night comedians, and baristas calculating tips, President Donald Trump has reportedly bought millions of dollars worth of Netflix and Warner Bros. Discovery bonds…
A Friendly Socialist Guide to Using Government Against People You Don’t Like (For educational, therapeutic, and extremely sincere reasons only) Point One: Define “Harm” Broadly, Preferably Poetically Harm is no longer a physical thing. Harm is a vibe. Harm is…
Meghan Markle Clarifies These Are Only Her Early Demands: Palace Braces for What Comes Next The Duchess of Sussex Assures Everyone This Is Just the Warm-Up Act Meghan Markle has reportedly issued what palace aides are carefully describing as “early…
Australia Bans Teens From Social Media, Accidentally Discovers Teens Have Been Online Longer Than the Government The Australian government announced this week that it has successfully removed thousands of social media accounts belonging to children, only to discover moments later…
Britain Performs Yet Another Elegant Policy U-Turn, Claims It Was “Always Facing This Direction” LONDON — Westminster insisted this week that the government had not reversed its position on property taxes so much as completed a “pre-planned rotational clarification,” a…
Sarah Ferguson Moves to Portugal to Escape Endless Brexit Debates Duchess discovers explaining Brexit abroad requires one sentence, not a flip chart and mediator Sarah Ferguson did not leave the United Kingdom in a rush. There was no dramatic midnight…
Britain Discovers the Slippery Slope, Immediately Sets Up a Queue at the Bottom of It Tax Breaks for Pubs & the EVERYONE ELSE AS WELL Britain’s independent bookshops have asked for the same tax relief as pubs, and within twelve minutes of that request…
Battles Over Truth Rage Online Amid Iran’s Internet Blackout How Turning Off the Internet Accidentally Created the World’s Loudest Imagination Contest The SEO keyword for this piece is Iran internet blackout. It appears in the title, headings, and body because search…
Protesters Discover the Ultimate Anti-Censorship Technology Cringe, Paper, and Metaphor Tehran is learning an ancient lesson: you can shut down the internet, but you cannot shut down a person who has just discovered the emotional power of a pen. With…
British Gen Z Can’t Read but They “Totally” Understand Memes In a story so perfectly ironic it practically wrote itself, Gen Z students are arriving at university unable to read full sentences according to lecturers shaking their heads in despair…
Australia’s War Against Teenagers With Phones: A Masterclass in Accidentally Creating Revolutionaries How Censorship Taught an Entire Generation to Question Authority Observations on Australia’s War Against Teenagers With Phones Teenagers in Australia have discovered that nothing radicalises a population faster…
The Greenland Gambit: America’s Newest Defence Strategy (Featuring Dog Sleds and Diplomacy) Satirical Arctic Security Brief Every great military strategy begins with a simple question: what if we put a base there? Greenland is the “there” currently keeping U.S. defence…
Trump Vs. “Islamonazi” Iran Let’s get this straight first: Iran’s foreign minister says the nationwide protests turned “bloody and violent” not because government forces shot their own citizens â but because protesters wanted to give Donald Trump a reason to…
Iranian Government Explains Nationwide Protests Are Actually a Spiritual Team-Building Exercise The Iranian government has confirmed that the wave of nationwide protests shaking the country is not, as critics have suggested, a sign of economic collapse, political repression, or public…
Iran Locates Internet’s Kill Switch, Hammers It With Authoritarian Glee In a breakthrough moment for state-sponsored silence, Iran has successfully discovered what tech companies pretend doesn’t exist: the actual bloody off button. This week, authorities reportedly scrambled satellite internet signals, including…
The Leftist AI Bulletin Conquers Fleet Street (No Hacks Were Harmed, Probably) By Nigel Typescript-Bottomley ⢠Prat.UK In 2025, British newsroom redundancies continued to devour journalism careers faster than a dodgy kebab after closing time. According to trackers of media job losses â obsessive…
Who Should Control British Newspapers? Or: How Britain Accidentally Invented the World’s Most Polite Media Oligarchy There are countries where the press is controlled by the state. There are countries where the press is controlled by corporations. And then there…
Royal Wedding Viewing Party Invasion: When Self-Appointed Experts Meet Actual Historians Proud Boys UK Crash Documentary Screening, Discover They Know Less Than They Thought Thirty members of Proud Boys UK transformed a peaceful community centre screening of a royal documentary Tuesday evening…
Donald Trump Declared Honorary EU Founder After Misreading Google Translate | European officials award Trump for diplomatic confusion that somehow strengthened continental unity
