Britain Solves Everything Except Defining Its Own Hatred
LONDON — Britain, famed for inventing the telephone, the jet engine, and the NHS waiting list, has apparently reached a limit: defining Islamophobia. Ministers have managed to publish reports on climate change, nuclear deterrence, and unicorn conservation in Scotland, but the concept of anti-Muslim hostility remains classified as “highly sensitive.”
According to internal government notes, defining Islamophobia might “limit rhetorical flexibility” in debates, a phrase analysts translate as “it’s easier to confuse everyone equally.” Meanwhile, Muslim communities report rising harassment incidents, suggesting that practical outcomes continue even when language fails.
Observers note that the UK’s approach mirrors a long tradition of bureaucratic optimism: a problem exists, but the paperwork remains purely aspirational.
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