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New Orleans “Bad Moms” To Invade London, Britain Activates Emergency Cultural Protocols
UK Uses Visa Restrictions to Pressure African Countries, Shocked This Counts as Pressure
Alexandra Palace Darts Fans Achieve New State of Consciousness, Scientists Baffled by “Fancy Dress Enlightenment”
Texas High Schoolers to Invade London, Britain Braces for Impact of American Marching Band Enthusiasm
PIA Flight to London Described as ‘Rejuvenating Wings of Longing’
London’s Shoplifting Hotspots Revealed, Surprising Absolutely Nobody
Tuesday December 30, 2025
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Category: News

PIA Flight to London Described as ‘Rejuvenating Wings of Longing’
News

PIA Flight to London Described as ‘Rejuvenating Wings of Longing’

Harriet CollinsDecember 27, 2025

PIA Flight to London Described as ‘Rejuvenating Wings of Longing’ | Pakistani airline’s marketing department absolutely losing it

London’s Shoplifting Hotspots Revealed, Surprising Absolutely Nobody
Featured News

London’s Shoplifting Hotspots Revealed, Surprising Absolutely Nobody

Emily CartwrightDecember 27, 2025

London’s Shoplifting Hotspots Revealed, Surprising Absolutely Nobody | Expensive areas contain expensive items worth stealing, study finds

BBC Live Coverage Continues Covering Things Live
News

BBC Live Coverage Continues Covering Things Live

Morag SinclairDecember 24, 2025

BBC Live Coverage Continues Covering Things Live | Broadcaster commits to reporting events as they happen

Channel Tunnel Declares Independence, Cuts Power to Celebrate
News

Channel Tunnel Declares Independence, Cuts Power to Celebrate

Isla CampbellDecember 23, 2025

Channel Tunnel Declares Independence, Cuts Power to Celebrate | British-French infrastructure opts for ‘sovereign electricity-free state’

Eurostar Urges Travelers to Postpone Trips It Already Cancelled
News

Eurostar Urges Travelers to Postpone Trips It Already Cancelled

Morag SinclairDecember 21, 2025

Eurostar Urges Travelers to Postpone Trips It Already Cancelled | Railway company advises against using non-existent services

Eurostar Introduces “Schrödinger’s Journey” Service
News

Eurostar Introduces “Schrödinger’s Journey” Service

Emily CartwrightDecember 19, 2025

Eurostar Introduces “Schrödinger’s Journey” Service: Passengers Simultaneously Arriving and Not Arriving Channel Tunnel power failure creates quantum state of travel where holidaymakers exist in multiple states of disappointment Eurostar has unveiled its most innovative service yet: a revolutionary travel experience…

Eurostar Suspends All Services to Encourage ‘British Holiday Staycations’
News

Eurostar Suspends All Services to Encourage ‘British Holiday Staycations’

Bethan MorganDecember 19, 2025

Eurostar Suspends All Services to Encourage ‘British Holiday Staycations’ | Train operator insists timing ‘completely coincidental’ with New Year

Jerusalem Report Publishes Report From Jerusalem, Groundbreaking Achievement
News

Jerusalem Report Publishes Report From Jerusalem, Groundbreaking Achievement

Lowri GriffithsDecember 17, 2025

Jerusalem Report Publishes Report From Jerusalem, Groundbreaking Achievement | Publication successfully covers city mentioned in title

Recent Posts

  • New Orleans “Bad Moms” To Invade London, Britain Activates Emergency Cultural Protocols
  • UK Uses Visa Restrictions to Pressure African Countries, Shocked This Counts as Pressure
  • Alexandra Palace Darts Fans Achieve New State of Consciousness, Scientists Baffled by “Fancy Dress Enlightenment”
  • Texas High Schoolers to Invade London, Britain Braces for Impact of American Marching Band Enthusiasm
  • PIA Flight to London Described as ‘Rejuvenating Wings of Longing’

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  • It’s Easter now, insist supermarkets
  • Today either Tuesday, Friday or Sunday, estimates delirious nation
  • ‘Is that it then?’ ask nation’s spoiled children
  • Santa prepares public statement following accusations that ‘he clearly prefers rich kids’
  • Woman left with no time to respond after absolute psychopath of a friend hand delivers card on Christmas Eve
RSS thedailymash.co.uk
  • Too posh to push? Fewer men than ever passing kidney stones naturally
  • We ask you: what are you unsuccessfully giving up this New Year?
  • Do you look like a cheap whore? A guide for paranoid women going to New Year’s parties
  • Man watching Hootenanny alone starts wanking to see if it’s possible to sink lower
  • Midnight f**king ages away when you’re staying up for it with kids
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  • ‘Growing up what was the first big ‘not allowed’ thing that you did anyway?’ – 22 rebellious rule breakers born to be mild
  • Donald Trump totally bought Putin’s claim that Ukraine targeted his residence with drones and we’ve never seen him this sympathetic
  • Donald Trump berated Joe Biden and his backing for the Federal Reserve chief ‘fool’ and it’s up there with his very best self-owns
  • This Andrew Tate-o-like’s comically awful Tinder patter got all the responses it deserved – 14 crushing smackdowns
  • A Brit said how much better Europeans have it than Americans and the Maga fury it prompted took it to a whole new level

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